i can haz all the xanax nao?

[withimpunity]

1. Today has been made of Complete and Total Epic Fail.

2. I need rum. Lots of rum.

3. And porn. Lots and lots of porn.

4. And something to put in my mouth.  A straw. An ink pen. A cock.  I DON'T CARE.

5. I changed my layout. Usually that cheers me up.  >_>

/nervous breakdown

Comments

[cosmicavatar.livejournal.com]

Oh, dear.

Re 4. Did you know that you can buy little plastic cocks to put on straws? (I didn't until my hen party, at which point commenced my enlightenment courtesy of my sister.) Kill two birds with one stone, I say.

*offers virtual rum and porn*

[oh-mcgee.livejournal.com]

Did you know that you can buy little plastic cocks to put on straws? LOLOLOL *dies* Oh, that is so much WIN.