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snippet tiem!




He can feel the wall Dean's putting up between them, keeping him out. He can feel the tension in the air, so heavy and thick it feels like drowning. It reminds Sam of when Dean put the stars on his ceiling when he was little and still afraid of the dark,  how he'd stare up at them for hours when he was supposed to be sleeping. He'd like to pretend he was a star, floating around weightless in the infinite miles of cold blackness that stretched on forever. That's exactly what it feels like now, Sam thinks, like there's an infinite universe of burning up stars and planets between them, and this time Dean isn't going to be there to soothe him and make it better.

Sam concentrates on the words in front of him when Dean walks into the livingroom, sitting on the edge of the ottoman as he slides his boots on his feet. He reads the word mitosis so many times he thinks its probably permanently etched into his retina.

“M'going to work on the car,” Dean mutters as he reaches for the door and Sam exhales when it shuts behind him. He feels like he's finally breached the surface of the water, but when he looks out the window and sees Dean slide in the driver's seat and pop the hood, its like being pushed right back under. Sam wonders if he'll ever be able to look at Dean again without feeling like he just wants to give up, let himself drift under and drown in whatever this is.

Date: 2008-11-09 12:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shiplessheathen.livejournal.com
I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS. God damn, stop making me overuse the capslock.

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