withimpunity | Fic: In Between the Lines - Nathan/Peter

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Fic: In Between the Lines - Nathan/Peter - NC-17

Title: In Between the Lines
Pairing: Nathan/Peter
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Peter would be 17 in this fic. Just sayin'.
Disclaimer: Heroes belongs to Tim Kring, NBC, and a lots of folks that aren't me.
Summary: He just doesn't have the ability Peter has, to read in between the lines, to see things that other people can't see.

Nathan removes his suit jacket and climbs through the window in Peter's room, out onto the flat roof where he knows he will find his brother. His lungs threaten to collapse when his eyes fall on Peter, legs dangling haphazardly off the roof. Seventeen year olds, he thinks to himself, always ten feet tall and bulletproof.

"What are you doing, Pete?" He asks, hoping he sounds calm enough not to startle Peter. Peter turns his head and looks back at him for a brief moment, then back out at the night sky. The moon will be full in just a few more days and the sky is full of stars tonight; its so bright out that Nathan feels exposed, as if he's standing beneath a giant spotlight.

"Just needed a breather," Peter replies, leaning back onto his hands. "Ursa major," He points directly above them at a cluster of stars. Nathan has never been interested in astronomy though, so he doesn't have the faintest idea which cluster of the millions of stars above them Peter is referring to.

"Would you mind scooting back a bit, Peter?" Nathan asks nervously and loosens his tie.

Peter turns and glares at him. "Do you see it, Nathan?"

"See what, Pete?" Nathan sighs. He's tired. It's been a long damn night, meeting and greeting his father's clients, future clients of his own if he's lucky, and he's really not in the mood to talk Peter down from a ledge. He knows how bad Peter hates these events, almost as much as he did when he was Peter's age, but giving Nathan a heart attack isn't the way to win his support.

"Right there," Peter says insistently, still pointing into the blanket of stars above them. Nathan squints, focuses, gets nothing. He just doesn't have the ability Peter has, to read in between the lines, to see things that other people can't see. It used to envy him, but now he understands who he has to be.

"Yeah," He murmurs. "I see it."

This seems to placate Peter for the moment and he humors Nathan, scooting backward a few inches before he points over to the left. "The Big Dipper," he says. "Everyone can see the big dipper, Nathan."

Nathan doesn't understand how his seventeen year old little brother can make him feel so insignificant on top of a damn roof when he should be schmoozing old ladies with enormous fortunes, but he does nevertheless. And he literally cannot see The Big Dipper.

"It's right there," Peter says, grabbing Nathan's arm, using his own finger to point to the bundle of bright stars sprinkled across the sky in the shape of large, well, dipper. Peter's fingers press into the inside of his wrist and he shakes Nathan's arm as he says "Right there, right THERE Nathan. See it? Just follow where I'm pointing." Peter needs him to be able to see these things with him, so even though he still can't see it, he tells Peter he can.

Peter lets Nathan's arm go, satisfied again - for the moment- and reclines onto his back. The moon is so bright its nearly blinding, but he doesn't mind. Beside him, Nathan kicks off his shoes, makes that defeated sighing noise Nathan always makes when he thinks Peter is being ridiculous, and lies down on the roof next to him.

"What's really bothering you, Pete?" He asks even though he knows he won't get a genuined response out of him. Not yet.

"Gemini," Peter murmurs softly, not pointing this time, and Nathan is looking at him rather than the sky. "Two brothers, Castor and Pollux. Pollux was so overcome with grief when Castor died that he begged Jupiter to let him share his immortality with him. He couldn't live without him."

"Peter-"

"You left me here, Nathan," Peter whispers, his tone laced with hurt and accusation. Nathan sighs; so they're going to do this again.

"And what was I supposed to do, Pete? Take you to the city with me?" He's being bitter with Peter and the strange thing is, he feels guilty for it. He berates and insults people for a living, but goes soft when he speaks harshly to his brother. He doesn't know what to think about that.

"Yes!" Peter interrupts him, raising up on his elbows. "Yes. You should have taken me with you, Nathan. I hate it here, you know that! How could you just go off and leave me here with them?"

"Peter," Nathan says carefully, rolling over to his side, putting his hand on Peter's shoulder. "You know if I could do that, I would."

"You're a fucking liar," Peter hisses angrily and jerks his shoulder away from Nathan's touch. Nathan is the best liar in the world. He can make anything that comes out of his mouth sound like truth, no matter how impossible or ludicrous. It's taken him years, but Peter has finally learned not to believe anything his brother says. The other option is just too painful.

"Mouth," Nathan replies teasingly. He knows this isn't the time, but he can't help it, its in his blood. Peter scowls and flips his middle finger at him before sitting up and throwing his legs back over the side of the house. Nathan's breath catches in his throat and he chokes as Peter wobbles unsteadily. He gets up to sit next to him, if only to calm his own nerves.

They sit in silence for five, ten minutes, or it could have been hours. Nathan doesn't know and doesn't care. He's not worried about the people downstairs anymore or what his father will think about his absence, nor the disappointed face his mother will give him when she learns he's been "coddling" Peter again. Right now he just needs to be here, beside Peter, ready to catch him if he falls.

"They hate me," Peter says when he finally speaks again, staring down at the finely manicured rosebushes beneath his feet.

"Of course they don't," Nathan returns almost too quickly. "They're your parents Peter, they love you."

"They love you," Peter replies dryly and pushes his shoes off the end of his toes, watching them smash the dark crimson buds on the bush below. "I'm not you, Nathan."

"And thank God for that," Nathan replies, tipping Peter's face toward him with his finger on his chin. "You're going to be all right, Peter."

Peter shakes his head slightly, fighting back the tears that have been watering beneath his eyelids for the past hour. It won't be all right. As long as he has to live here with people who continuously measure him against Nathan it will never be all right. He's not Nathan. He never will be. He can only be himself. Peter Petrelli, Least Likely To.

"Peter," Nathan murmurs and wraps his hand around the back of Peter's neck, pulling him against his chest. It isn't until then that Peter realizes he's sobbing like the pathetic weakling they all think he is. He feels Nathan press his lips against his hair and sigh, but there's a something different about this particular sigh. Regret, maybe?

Peter picks his head up and wipes his face on his own jacket sleeve, now eye level with Nathan. He wants to say something. He has plenty of things to say, lists of them even, hidden in the drawer beneath his socks and underwear, but cannot for the life of him remember them now.

"I love you Nathan," He blurts out. Not exactly what he'd wanted to say, but it works, and before Nathan can reply with the standard, platonic, brotherly, "I love you too, man," Peter leans into Nathan and kisses him.

Peter should be used to rejection by now, seeing as how it's been the only constant in his life so far, and he probably could have shrugged it off if it was plain, normal rejection, which this isn't. This is being rejected by his brother, by Nathan, by the one person he loves and trusts more than anything in the entire fucking world. Angela isn't wrong when she says he idolizes him; he does. He wishes he could be more like Nathan - harder, stronger, more important- but he can't. He's just Peter. Completely unimportant.

"Peter," Nathan says, unconsciously touching his fingers to his lips. "Why...why would you do that?"

Peter feels like hurling himself off the roof. He had thought - okay, he had hoped that maybe, possibly Nathan would understand. That they were actually connected the way he liked to think they were. Apparently he'd been wrong. Again.

"Sorry," Peter apologizes, wiggling his sock covered toes in the cool night air. "I just thought. Sorry. I snuck some of Dad's good red out. I think I'm a little drunk."

"Funny," Nathan says, thinking he should probably be more distraught by what just happened than he is. "You don't smell like wine." Or taste like it, for that matter.

Peter only shrugs. "Go back to your party, Nathan."

"Peter, let's-"

"No," Peter interrupts, gripping the side of the roof until his knuckles are ghost-white. "Please. Just go."

"I'm not leaving you Peter," Nathan replies, pushing his fingers through Peter's too-long hair. "I won't ever leave you."

Peter turns his head, an angry scowl on his face, and opens his mouth to tell Nathan to just get the fuck out, leave him alone, and don't ever come back, when Nathan pulls him close and covers his mouth with his own.

Nathan feels like he's swimming, or dreaming. Or dreaming of swimming. His tongue slips into Peter's warm mouth so easily, as if it knows exactly where it's going and what to do, and he stops worrying about how much this should bother him and starts concentrating on everything he loves about Peter.

Peter's masculine, teenagery cologne, Peter's stubbly chin scratching against his own freshly shaved one, Peter's mouth that tastes of the cherries he'd seen on the buffet earlier. His hands find purchase on Peter's jacket and push it away from his shoulders, whimpering in protest when Peter takes his mouth away.

Nathan can see his breath fog the air when he gasps as Peter replaces his lips on his neck and begins sucking the flesh into his mouth, bringing angry red and purple blood vessels to the surface where everyone will be able to see. He wishes that he cared enough to stop him, but he doesn't.

Peter pushes him down on his back and pins him down with his legs, looking briefly into Nathan's hazel eyes (glowing almost white under the moonlight) before capturing his mouth once again. He can't remember how long he's wanted to do this, shove his tongue down Nathan's throat and taste it all, feel Nathan's hard body underneath him, helpless. The power trip is intoxicating and hee wonders how Nathan can live with it every day.

Nathan grips Peter by the back of the head and kisses him back with fervor. Its like a battle inside their mouths, just like its a battle with everything with them it seems. They're brothers; its in their nature to fight over everything and right now they're fighting to see who has wanted this more. Eventually, they decide its probably a tie, and they both give in.

When Peter rolls his hips into him, Nathan isn't expecting to feel the hard on pressing into him, and knows he shouldn't be as turned on by it is as he is, but he can't help it. Peter's hard for him. Peter, his little brother, who he loves more than he even loves himself, who looks up at him like a hero, who idolizes him. All of a sudden, Nathan's drunk with lust and power and want for his little brother. For Peter. He understands now. Everything is clear now. Peter loves him.

"I love you Peter," He whispers next to Peter's ear as he strokes Peter's hair affectionately, trailing kisses down the side of his neck. Peter moans as Nathan sucks the lobe of his ear into his mouth and grinds his hips reflexively against Nathan's, desperately needing to feel something, anything against his hard, throbbing erection. Much to Peter's surprise, Nathan returns his thrusts with one of his own and Peter gasps upon realizing that he isn't the only one turned on by this. It's almost more than he can handle.

"Nathan," He gasps, rolling his hips against Nathan, eyes rolling back into his head as their cocks rub against each other. "Fuck."

"Mouth," Nathan mumbles, curling his fingers around Peter's awkward, bony hips as they grind against one another.

"Oh fuck," Peter groans, his cock twitching at the sound of Nathan scolding him while they basically dry hump each other on the roof of their parents house. Every inch of his body is alive and awake and his head feels detached from his body, though that very well could be because all his blood is circulating below the belt.

For the next however many minutes (does it matter, really?) they say nothing, the only sounds to be heard being each other's rough, ragged breathing as they thrust and grind their hips together, desperately trying to reach that beautiful place together. Occasionally Peter would lean down and suck on Nathan's neck, or Nathan would arch forward and pull Peter's bottom lip between his teeth, but still they say nothing.

Once, Nathan opens his eyes while Peter is busy putting yet another mark on him, and he almost can't believe his eyes. The moon is directly behind them, casting an ethereal, white glow around Peter's head. It looks strangely like a halo, Nathan thinks, and his body shudders in response. When he blinks and opens his eyes again though, it's gone.

Peter's breathing heavily against his neck when he finally speaks again and what he says is more of a prayer or a chant than anything else. Nathan Nathan God Nathan love you so much fuck Nathan please-

It doesn't take long after hearing the desire and desperation in Peter's voice for Nathan to react. Peter raises up on his arms, eyes open wide as Nathan begins to unfasten his trousers.

"You don't-"

"I want to." Nathan tells him firmly and those three words probably mean more to Peter than anything in his life. He closes his eyes as Nathan's hand slips underneath the elastic of his boxer briefs, fingers curling around him possessively, naturally, like he's done it before. When he begins to stroke Peter, coating his hand in the clear liquid leaking from the tip, Peter falls forward, burying his face in Nathan's neck, mumbling a string of incoherencies and profanities that would put a sailor to shame.

"Peter," Nathan purrs softly next to Peter's ear as he lets Peter fuck his hand. The sounds Peter make are intoxicating to his senses, making him acutely aware of everything, and when Peter finally stiffens, cries out his name, and spills hot and sticky into his palm, Nathan follows him to that beautiful place.

"Don't leave," Peter mumbles as soon as he regains coherency. He knows Nathan and he knows what this means, and he knows exactly what Nathan is thinking. He's thinking how stupid this was, how he's probably scarred Peter for life, how he needs to get back downstairs before some finds them like this (though on the roof, its unlikely) and he's thinking that they can never do this again.

Peter knows Nathan probably won't visit again now for months, only on major holidays when he feels obligated. That Nathan will probably never be able to look him in the eye, or throw his arm around him, or press his lips into his hair ever again. So he holds on tight, memorizing each tiny detail (the smell of sex and Nathan and summer air, the reflection of the moon in his eyes, the sound of Nathan's racing heart) about the moment he can before Nathan runs away from him. Again.

"I'm not leaving you Pete," Nathan says, rubbing Peter's back affectionately, brotherly, and maybe it's the haze of afterglow leaving him dizzy and lightheaded, but Peter actually believes him this time.

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woah wow :]
urm that was beautiful and delicious

Thank you! i'm glad you liked it. It's my first Nathan/Peter other than a drabble here or there, so I was nervous about posting it!

Now that was gorgeous.

They're brothers; its in their nature to fight over everything and right now they're fighting to see who has wanted this more. Eventually, they decide its probably a tie, and they both give in.

AND sweet.

AW, thank you! They are gorgeous AND sweet, couldn't be helped! :D

Absolutely and completely beautiful. :D

*GLOMP*

ZOMG.

NEXT WE TACKLE TEH RPS. WE WILL CONQUER THE WORLD. YES.

This was very nice, but the ending is what made it for me. The ending is beautiful. Just, aw. Loved it.

Thank you! I always worry about my endings so I'm glad that you liked it.

OHHHH - That was a hurty kind of good. ~ Beautiful job w. this.

It was incredibly sweet and emotional but sexy as hell at the same time.

LOVED IT ~

That was a hurty kind of good.

Yayz! lol. I'm new to teh angst, so I appreciate that. I'm glad you liked it!

*is momentarily speechless*

Not only the fic hot as all hell, the ending is just the most adorable thing to end on. The last three paragraphs are really the concept that makes the pairing, for me. ♥

Speechless ftw! I'm so happy you liked it! Also? Icon love! "I don't know who I am without you." ♥ ♥ ♥

Beautiful! Loved it.

Thank you for commenting. I'm glad you liked it!

Wow.. this was a hot fic! Great job, i really enjoyed reading it ♥

Thank you!! So glad you liked it!

um....GUH
I am now officially incoherent!
*hypersquee*

Hypersquee ftw! *lol* I'm glad you liked it to the point of incoherency. :DD

This rings so true. It would explain so much in their twisted relationships. How Peter so desperately wants to trust and count on Nathan and why Nathan seems so somehow uncomfortable with it and yet you just know he would never consider just presenting Peter with a closed door.

Oh, also - putting this into the memories. Thanks for sharing.

you just know he would never consider just presenting Peter with a closed door. Yep, that's Nathan to a tee.

I'm so glad you liked this! I'm not sure if I've been in someone's memories before. Whee! :D

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junalele.livejournal.com - 2007-11-10 22:02 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

oh-mcgee.livejournal.com - 2007-11-10 22:34 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

junalele.livejournal.com - 2007-11-10 23:09 (UTC) - Expand

That was lovely. All hot and bittersweet at the same time.

Thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoyed reading it.

Oh, that was so beautiful!

Perfect characterization too. You made these boys break my heart in the best way :)

Thank you so much! It means a lot that you liked the characterization. These boys definitely having a way of making you break, don't they?

I loved this! Especially when Nathan surprised Peter by kissing him instead of leaving. Very hot.

Yay, I'm glad you liked it!

Wow, this is wonderful. You are an amazing writer.

Aw, thank you!!

the first heroes fanfic i read. and it is a worthy one! :-)

Omg, I feel speshul. Glad you thought it was worthy! :D

(no subject)

rieloflorien.livejournal.com - 2007-11-11 21:08 (UTC) - Expand

Beautiful.

I'm glad you thought so. :)

Oh, yes, that was wonderful.

Thank you!

This is beautiful.

(Also, I'm brand new to the fandom, so if every fic is even HALF as well-written as this is, I feel like I'm going to absolutely love it around here)

Ohmigosh, wow. What a compliment! Thank you and welcome to the fandom!!!!

aslkfjosdjfvndknxklzncfas *KEYSMASH*.

Love it. Oh so much <3.

Keysmash FTW. Glad you liked it bb. :D

This is what a friend of mine calls "Chinese Mustard fic" meaning it's both sweet and hot.

This is really lovely.

OMGROFL!!1 That's freakin' hilarious. Thank you for commenting. :DD

oh, oh my......

YES!.........yes.

:DDD Thank you!

I fucking loved it. Great job. P/N is awesome, but young P/N, damn. Awesome job.

Thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

To be quite honest, I don't usually read smut. Very, very rarely. Or, rather, I try not to pay attention to it. I'll read a story with it in it, but I skim it, get the general idea, then move on to "the real story". Most authors (imo) write smut crudely and dully. An overuse of obscene terms is common, and the emotions of the characters seem to impact the scenes very little.

Your story is the first Peter/Nathan story I've found that did none of the above. The entire story from beginning to end was written tastefully, in-character, and with actions and emotions utterly entwined. I can't tell you how happy I'd be if all R/NC-17 stories were written like this one. The rating seems to flow naturally from the story, instead of being forced and lifeless.

Keep writing (Petrellicest).

Deary me! That's by far the best comment I've ever received on a fic. *blushes* Thank you so much. I always worry about wirting the smut because, like you, I don't like to read it when its too crude or distasteful or forced, so I'm ecstatic that you didn't find it to be any of those. THANK YOU! (((hugs)))

As you've probably already realized from the other reviews, this story was absolutely AMAZING!

I can only think of a small amount of other fan fics I've read that have done such a competent job of creating a sinister ambiance with such subtlety.

This was fabulous and utterly IC. It's definitely a breath of fresh air in a tidal wave of bad fics I've read.

I love, love, LOVE this! Beautifully done!

*superblush* Thank you so much!

I can't believe I missed this the first time around, but I'm totally commenting on it now, see?

YAYGUHWOWOMGCAN'TTHINKSTRAIGHTHOLYCRAPSMEXYDIDIMENTIONGUH?!

Oh, and "Mmm," as well. *is so adding this story to memories*

Hee! I'm glad you found it worthy of so much capslockyness. *glomps*

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